It's been a couple of weeks since my last update, but I think you'll understand when I tell you what's going on. I'm losing my house. I've tried working out solutions, yadda yadda, but I decided giving up was the wisest choice--for me. Honestly, I'm no longer all that enamored of home ownership. I've done it for 12 years, and I'm ready to let someone else worry about repairs and taxes.
Now for the positives: This house is too much house for just Kevin and me, so we're moving into a smaller house that will be much easier to keep clean and in order. Packing to move has forced me to clean out unbelievable amounts of useless crap--things I haven't looked at in five years, things I'd never, in a million years, use. I can't believe I had all that junk sitting around gathering dust. No wonder I've felt overwhelmed and mentally cluttered for the past few years! With each bag of trash that gets tossed, I feel lighter mentally and emotionally.
Next positive: We're moving to a college town (and, yes, it's the town where Daniel goes to school, but I've sworn a blood oath not to intrude too often), and as I told Greg, I feel as though I'm re-entering civilization after 12 years of exile. The new town has live music and theater! An art museum! Tons of restaurants, bookstores, and cool shops! A botanical garden! A historical society! I can't wait to get out and start exploring.
Yet another positive: The job market up there is much, much better than here in Mayberry, so Kevin and I are hoping he can find a job with more of a future. After a little surfing, I've already seen listings for job search, career counseling, and job retraining services, so that's a good sign, I think.
And another one: Rent is going to be far less than my mortgage payment, so I can get caught up financially and maybe even save some money (what a concept).
I know losing my house is a bad thing, but I don't think I'm wrong to feel a little hopeful. This house and this town were a wonderful place to raise Daniel, but that chapter of my life is over. Time to turn the page to the next one.
I won't have Internet access next week because my service provider is switching cable companies, but I might head over to the library a few times and check e-mail (address over there to the left). I'll have plenty to do to keep me busy--just wish me strength to withstand the withdrawal pangs, would you?